determined enough to act

the other day i had to accomplish what seemed to be a daunting task. thinking about it the night before i knew i had to do it, and then again yesterday morning before i got started, i was mildly discouraged. how in the world was i ever going to get the job done? yes, i had all day to do it, being fortunate enough to be able to set the day aside, but i was still overwhelmed at the thought of how i was spending a large part of my saturday...a saturday that was already slated for busyness from 4:30 pm on...


all the details are neither here nor there, but for the sake of context, let me just explain that it involved needing to clean up after an event. again, let's forget the fact that the building actually wasn't a right off this time (either because the crowd was more respectful of the space, or because the various volunteers went out of their way to do more than expected). forget the fact that i managed to do what i needed to do (plus a little extra) in about 5 hours. and let's even forget that i get paid to do what i do.


removing those variables, let's just look at it for what it was: a job that needed done...


like i indicated, when i got in the building, i assessed the situation and found it to not be too bad. however, i had already accepted the fact that the job was mine to do no matter how long it took me or how bad it might be, or how unprepared or ill equipped or unable i felt i was. by the time i entered the building i had already made up my mind that it didn't matter how messy it was, or what i had to do, i was going to get it done. before getting started, while i was finishing a coffee, i tweeted and updated my facebook status to say this: "determination isn't measured by ability but activity. how badly do you want it? get to it. make. it. happen." 


that's original, by the way :-) i was thinking about my approach to the situation, that changed when i decided i was determined to get going and get it done. i consider myself a clean person and a decent cleaner, but there are times when i'm faced with a mess that i don't quite know what to use, or what to do...like the time i had to clean coffee off the new carpet--what product? just water? air dry or sponge up the excess? or the time there was wax all over the pews. or the first time big bertha's 18l vacuum cleaner bag needed changed. or at my other job in a busy real estate office, encountering a new variable in a counter offer for a deal that requires filling out paperwork i've never seen, or fielding phone calls from lawyers or bankers who forget i don't know their jargon so i'm not quite sure what it is they need.


you get the point. and you know from experience what i'm talking about. you could weigh in with dozens and dozens of similar instances where you've faced a task, or a situation, or a person, and there are all these variables that make you think you aren't able to meet the demands. and let me just insert that i'm not talking about ability in the sense of talent and knowing what you're good at and concentrating your efforts in the area that matches your abilities. this isn't a blog entry on the merits of talent and ability and doing what you know you're good at and called to do because you have particular strengths. 


no, this is an entry just to remind myself that there are going to be times when i'm going to be faced with dealing with an issue that i might have little experience in and possibly no ability, in the sense of aptitude, or skill, or qualification. it might even not only be in an area that's not my forté; it might be in an area of downright weakness! like the time i fixed a broken toilet by googling what to do, getting it wrong, and trying again. and again. i'm not a plumber, and i don't like toilets, but determination got the best of me, instead of the inclination to complain, do nothing, pretend i didn't see it, or pass the buck.


yesterday i learned a lesson before i even got started as i tweeted and updated my facebook status. i got the job done because i got active. my determination to get the job done had nothing to do with ability because really, anybody can wash windows and vacuum the carpet. yesterday it wasn't about being a good cleaner. it wasn't about strengths as a cleaner. it was about being faced with a job and getting active and making it happen. at the end of the 5 hours, my determination wasn't measured by my ability to clean because someone could have done a better job in less amount of time. i know that. my determination was measured by my activity, not my ability.


the way i see it, if i let ability determine my level of determination, there will be things i never attempt that i'd probably end up being pretty successful at if i'd only try. i will be the couch potato, bump on a log, and stick in the mud who critiques other people's ability and activity, who never contributes anything other than a negative commentary. i don't want to be that person.


here's an idiom that gets to the heart of what i'm saying: "where the rubber meets the road." this is the most important point for something, the moment of truth. an athlete can train all day, but the race is where the rubber meets the road. she'll never know how good she really is until she gets active and in motion...until her feet hit the ground running. it's not about how able she is to run the race if the race is never run. it's not about how able i am if i'm not determined to get up and get going. i'm not really determined if i'm not active, no matter how able i am.


i think you get the point, so i'll not labour it any longer :-) i encourage you to act. your determination to act will be met with ability. go for it.